I have finally started it……The Bucket List. I suppose it is something most everyone thinks about for years and then suddenly you just do it. That is how it was for me. Seems like there would always be plenty of time to consider doing things I really wanted to do after I had accomplished everything I needed to do first. So that was my mind-set. I almost felt guilty if I took time for myself to do something I considered fun.
I prided myself in being a good daughter, a good wife, a good mother, a good grandmother, a good friend. I have made myself available to those that need me and have tended to my responsibilities. This was something I wanted to do from my heart; no second-guessing there. I was taught as a child that a person is only as good as their word and that equaled dependability. When I make a commitment, there is no deviation.
And the years went by. My children grew up; my parents passed on; friendships evolved, dissipated, new ones were discovered and rediscovered. I continued to wait for “someday” to begin; the time when I would follow my heart and add an extra spark of laughter to the day or a moment of being carefree and doing something out of the ordinary. The realization finally hit me. What was I waiting for? I suppose it was for the house to be organized to perfection, every bit of life’s paperwork to be completed, and the assurance that all would be wonderful, calm, and perfect in the lives of those I cared about. Now those are some real expectations.
I have accepted the fact I was being unrealistic and decided to adopt a different mind-set, one that would embrace those simple things I longed to do. I thought it would be easy to change my ways. It hasn’t been. I procrastinated, which didn’t take much effort, and seemed to have more reason than moving forward toward my goals. After all, my personality is that of a nurturer. That is what I have always been good at. I stayed comfortable and on the course I have always known, while I looked forward to “someday”.
I can’t really say there was one single thing that got my attention, other than the “tap” on the shoulder we all feel occasionally and know God is trying to encourage us to move in a certain direction. That, and the memory of my daddy saying, “Do It!” I have finally started focusing on those things my heart desires to do. My Bucket List is pretty simple. My list includes visiting a few places in The United States, for one. There are a few regions I would like to visit abroad, but never will. I have no desire for my feet to leave American soil for many reasons, so I will thank those I know that are brave enough to travel and share photos of their experiences. That will be the way I visit those faraway lands. I want to expand my creative side to paint a picture, which I have never tried, but just know would be interesting to see what developed. There are boxes and boxes of old photographs of generations of my family that I want to enjoy, organize, and categorize, as well as do some extensive research on my genealogy. The most adventurous feat I want to attempt is zip lining and I’ll be sure to write about that experience.
Most of all, I want to write. Writing is therapeutic and strengthens my individuality. It allows expression that otherwise would be left unattended; A way I can leave my voice and a glimpse into my being for my children and generations to come. It is an array of reflections into depth that is anything but generic. As the adage goes, some things are better left unsaid. While true in many instances, a bridge can be constructed through written words to offer expressions, thoughts, and ideas that would otherwise never be known.
So, now I wonder why I waited so long to think about The Bucket List. I should have started it when I was a teenager or young adult. But who does that? Bucket Lists are for people who are older and in the life’s seasons of Fall or Winter….well, maybe late Summer, too, and realize the “Spring chicken part of life” is gone. What odd concepts we have of our life’s journey. Each stage of our lives should include the joys of what we would pen on a Bucket List. As for me, I’m not waiting another day. I don’t want to miss anything!
God did not promise a tomorrow nor did He create us to be idle. We are to have a joyful heart and walk through this life with Him as our guide. He will provide the ink in which to write The Bucket List.
I’ll see you on the flip side………